The past 14 days have been a blur of sorts. Everyone has returned to work, and their lives. The obituary is done. Dad has been cremated. Mom is busy cleaning and putting the house back together. I still continue to dream.

Last nights dream was I was the only one in the house who had a clue that dad was dead. Everyone was flitting about as if he wasn’t. I was standing there trying to yell in my dream hey dad what are you doing here you’re dead. And I was panicked because nobody was acknowledging  what I was saying.

I don’t want to dream about him anymore for a while. It’s way too upsetting. I’ve been having panic attacks, not sleeping well, i’m feeling anxiety, and angst. Cripes, i’m feeling anxious just writing about this.